Iran

Iran – can’t live with them, can’t live without the petroleum. From the earliest of dynasties to Alexander the Great taking control, Persia as it was until 1935 always had someone on their case. It was only until 1502 that Persia re-emerged with the same general boundaries under Ismail Safavi and Shi’ite Islam was declared the state religion. The Safavids ruled for up to 250 years. Interest in the region was growing and not for the beautiful poetry or the theocratic rule but for Persian oil and the great geo-strategic importance of Iran in the Middle East.

In 1907 the British and Russians divided the country up into 3 zones – north and south and a neutral buffer zone in the middle – imagine doing that today? The Iranians then endured political mayhem in WWI with more British, Russian and the obligatory German interference. The Qajar dynasty did their best to combat the main occupants (Russia) until 1926 until Reza Shah Pahlavi was crowned ruler. Pahlavi buddied up to Germany later to modernise the country - even calling Persia ‘Aryan’ or Iran – freaky! By 1941 the Russians and British became ever more suspicious of the affinity of the two countries causing the abdication of the Shah, Pahlavi’s son then took over.

By the late 1950’s the US and the West were closely tied to Iran – I wonder why? The Aryan ideals continued with the ‘White Revolution’ ushering a newer period of land reform and the so-called modernisation. Strangely enough party politics occurred but the Islamic clerical side of power were opposed to the secularisation. Secret police were roving the country for the Shah and with this the Ayatollah Khomeini was exiled. So started the riots, strikes and massive demonstrations that were encountered, martial law did nothing, the Shah fled, Khomeini returned and the US embassy was swamped by students in 1979, hostages were held for over a year. But the US kept the Iranians busy with the Iran-Iraq war. The Iranians lost thousands of men from almost trench like attacks. By 1984 the Persian Gulf was aflame with ‘tanker wars’ where the US became involved to protect shipping which led to the ‘accidental’ shooting down of an Iranian airline in 1988. The US couldn’t help the goodwill offering of selling secret arms to Iran. The negotiations now known as the Iran-Contra affair. Iran pulled the pin and decided peace with Iraq was the better option, besides Iran was out of ammo.

Political control was still with the Islamic radicals. Khomeini died in 1989 and the country mourned and mourned and mourned and bloody mourned! In the early 90’s Iran had no choice but to rebuild and become friends with Saudi Arabia and Britain. Salman Rushdie got a Fatwah against himself for taking the piss out of Islam. The majority of the 1990s was reformists versus conservatives; crude oil sales slumped; trade embargoes followed; assassination attempts and today one wonders if Iran’s current President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is really building nuclear power plants or rabbit hutches. Fingers are crossed that Iran won’t get listed as part of the ‘axis of evil’ and then be pummelled by the USA. Although Iran claims they have been watching the US and all their movements in Iraq for the last 3 years. Iran the true ‘Aryan’s’ just like America – damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

Should we talk about the football? They’ll do better than Australia and expect them to earn a lot of respect – one can’t be ‘evil’ all the time. Ali Karami will fire and veteran Ali Daei will break a goalpost whilst falling from the sky after a winning header against Mexico.

The future? They’ll make it. Yes they will. Mexico will mess it up on game one and Iran will play a thriller in the last match against Angola. Expect an exciting tournament from Iran.
Bottomless pit ranking? Is it really that important to the rest of non-Iranian fans? Iran initially struggled to get friendly games organised and there were cries to have Iran kicked out of the World Cup because they are building bombs (Ooh I’m scared). What everyone should realise is that Iran was recently elected vice-chair on the UN disarmament commission. Aaah, the values of propaganda when you need to go to war. Evil? What about everyone else?

- Johnny Nonation